Suddenly, we’re celebrities.

            One of my oldest friends, who astonishingly had identical twin girls almost exactly one year before I birthed my boy/girl twins, told me it was going to happen. You step into the world with your double stroller and super deluxe backpack-slash-diaper bag and your four-year old and your two babies and all the world turns to look at you. It’s quite lovely most of the time, especially when we’ve been stuck in the house for a week with coughs and colds, or maybe an entire month (don’t ask me about March), and when you go outside, people just line up to coo and burble and admire my children. They all want to interact with our miraculous family, and they all have something to say! It’s probably exactly a 50-50 split between the people who say “God bless you,” as in, God has blessed us, versus those who say “God bless you,” as in, better you than me.

            People always have plenty to say about our children, and they always assume we want to hear it. I have to admit that most of it is complimentary, but I am often surprised at how total strangers will make personal comments about my children, much the same way your stomach becomes public property when you’re pregnant. Having twins relegates you to a special status, and people often want to participate in that specialness. But they do say the darndest things.

            The absolutely most frequent question is, amazingly, “Are they twins?” My babies are, of course, fraternal, and different genders, no less, so while they look different, they are of very similar size and heft. I suppose I could be babysitting my friend’s 9-month-old infant and taking her out shopping with my own 9-month-old infant and older son… but does anyone do that? I’ve heard the comment so many times I’ve managed to overcome my, “Well, duh” reaction, which is all for the best.

            The second most common comment is, “Are they identical?” I assumed that as they got older, people would stop asking that question. To be fair, both my son and daughter are quite bald, round cheeked and blue-eyed, and to anyone who doesn’t stare lovingly into a baby’s face on a regular basis, most babies look alike. I certainly can’t tell gender in an under 1, and sometimes in an under 2. But the crazy thing is, people still ask me that even AFTER they find out they’re boy/girl. I mean, really. Even if you’re not up on the whole two placentas, two sacs thing, having entirely different sets of genitalia doesn’t seem particularly identical to me. So much for public education.

            Probably the weirdest comment I’ve had is, “Which one is the good twin?” Obviously soap operas are an integral part of your life. “Hello, my name is Daniel, and this is my evil twin sister, Danielle.” I’ve had variations of that one: “Which one is the quiet twin?” “Which baby sleeps better?” “Which one is calmer?” Yes, it’s a requirement that all twins be polar opposites. Fortunately, mine appear to have lost the manual.

            But you’ll never believe the number one comment people make.

            “Boy, you’ve got your hands full!”

            I just don’t know why they say it. Do they think I need to be told how busy I am? I’m the one with one baby on my front in the carrier with the second baby in the stroller next to the diaper bag full of diapers (clean and dirty), drinks, snacks, clothing changes and a medicine cabinet with my oldest son taking up the rear trailing cheddar bunnies for Hansel and Gretel to follow.          It seems to be the wittiest comment most people can manage, and I find it fascinating that they all come up with the same witty comment. It’s amazing how quickly a comment’s wit dissipates upon the 200^th hearing.

            I don’t mean to be snide, or annoyed, or dismissive. I’m just having an experience most people will never understand, because most people will never have two infants in their care. It defines more of my immediate life than makes me entirely comfortable. I am a Twin Mom. I am other things too, but they’ve been placed gently aside for now. My twins will not be infants forever, and that both thrills and saddens me. Our celebrity status will diminish over time as well, as my distinctly not-identical twins grow and change. And that’s all for the best. But for now, in this hectic, intense, wild time of our lives, a little appreciation from the admiring masses goes a long way.

~Stacy